Gantry Kids & Teens

How to Help Your Child Overcome Fear & Anxiety About Fitness

Gantry Kids • Sep 30, 2023

Help your child overcome fitness fears and anxieties with our step-by-step guide for supportive parents.

Jason was always filled with dread when it came time for gym class. At just 10 years old, he felt sick to his stomach every time he had to run laps or play a game with his classmates. No matter how much his parents encouraged him, he could not overcome the overwhelming anxiety he felt about any physical activity.


Like Jason, many children today struggle with fear and anxiety when it comes to fitness and exercise. According to recent statistics from the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, anxiety disorders impact 25% of all children. When kids are fearful or anxious, it can be extremely difficult for them to participate in sports and physical activities.

The good news is that parents can take steps to help their children overcome these fears. With the right approach and proper support, children can break through their anxiety and gain the confidence they need to enjoy being active. This article will provide helpful, actionable tips for parents seeking to help their kids develop a healthy relationship with fitness.

Understand the Root Causes

The first step is uncovering where your child's fears originate. Have an open conversation and ask questions like:

  • Did they have a bad experience that created these fears? For example, were they ever bullied or humiliated during a sports practice? Were they injured while playing? Understanding the trigger incident can help you address it.
  • Do they feel intimidated by competitive activities? Some kids are afraid of the pressure that comes with sports and exercise. Make sure to emphasize having fun over winning.
  • Are they self-conscious about their skills or appearance? Body image issues and poor self-esteem often fuel anxiety. Offer regular encouragement and praise.


Take time to truly listen to your child's concerns without judgement. Let them share at their own pace. Getting insight into the source of their anxiety is key to overcoming it. If your child is hesitant to open up, be patient and gain their trust over multiple conversations.


Consulting with your child’s doctor can also shed light on any physical issues contributing to the problem. For example, asthma may make vigorous activity difficult. Joint or muscle problems might cause pain. Address any health conditions to eliminate physical barriers.

Start Small and Offer Encouragement

It’s important not to push too hard too fast. Start with 5-10 minutes of activity your child feels comfortable with – even just walking around the block. Offer frequent encouragement to boost their confidence. Remember to focus praise on the effort they are putting in rather than the specific results. Say things like "I'm so proud of you for trying your best!" rather than "I'm impressed you ran 3 miles!"


Avoid any criticism about performance that could reinforce negative feelings. The priority is helping your child feel positively about being active, not achieving any fitness goals. Slowly build up the duration and challenge over time, taking care not to move too far beyond their comfort zone. Small, achievable targets are the key.

Make it Fun and Rewarding

Incorporating play, games, music, friendly competition and other fun elements will help your child associate exercise with enjoyment rather than dread. Schedule family activities like hiking, cycling or paddling to make fitness a bonding experience. Follow any activity sessions with a healthy treat to reinforce the positive effort they put in. Strawberries, bananas or other fruit make great options.


Following activity sessions, offer small non-food rewards to celebrate accomplishments. Stickers, temporary tattoos and other little prizes go a long way with kids. Just make sure to focus rewards on the effort they showed rather than specific results. The goal is to get them excited about being active for its own sake.

Enlist Outside Help if Needed

If you’ve tried multiple approaches and your child still faces paralzying anxiety, it may be time to bring in outside help. A patient, supportive personal trainer who specializes in working with kids can make all the difference. The right trainer will focus on creating fun routines versus hardcore workouts. Search for trainers experienced overcoming childhood fitness fears.

Scheduling play dates with understanding friends can also help. Peer encouragement goes a long way at building confidence. Choose friends your child feels comfortable with who will offer support. Small group activities can feel less intimidating.


If anxiety persists, consult your doctor about anti-anxiety medication as part of a comprehensive treatment plan. Medication should never be the only solution but when combined with the right behavioral strategies, it can help children push past paralyzing fitness fears. Explore treatment options like cognitive behavioral therapy as well.


Connecting with support groups for parents facing similar fitness-related fears in their kids provides a venue to share advice and ideas. Local rec centers, schools and community bulletin boards are good places to find groups. Online forums allow you to connect with other parents anywhere. Share your own challenges and learn from others.

Stay Consistent with Routines

Establishing set exercise routines at consistent times can help provide stability. Kids with anxiety thrive on predictability. Try scheduling 15-20 minutes of family fitness time after dinner each night, or make Saturday mornings "park day." Being active at the same times will start creating healthy habits.


Of course, stay flexible based on your child's needs day-to-day. If they are feeling particularly anxious, don't force them to stick to the routine. The goal is creating positive associations not battles. But in general, consistent routines build comfort through familiarity.

Focus on Overall Health, Not Just Fitness

Emphasize that being active is about taking care of your body and feeling good, not fitness outcomes like weight loss or muscle gain. Exercise should be part of an overall focus on health that includes proper nutrition, adequate sleep and strong social connections. Make balanced self-care routines a family priority.


Children learn by example. If you model self-care, your child will absorb these values. Cook healthy meals together, enjoy nightly screen-free family time and schedule regular check-ins to share feelings. A holistic approach fuels healthy attitudes about fitness.


The key is to remain understanding, patient and positive. Helping a child push past their fears requires creativity, compassion and commitment from parents. By taking the right supportive approach, you have the power to put your child on the path to developing a healthy, enthusiastic attitude about fitness for life. The team at Gantry Kids is always available to provide personalized guidance. Give us a call today so we can work together to help your child gain confidence and strength.

By Michele Kelber 25 Oct, 2024
Risky Play - Parent & Caregiver Buy In I know, Risky Play sounds SCARY! It may raise some eyebrows, but it's essential for a child's growth and development. Risky Play is generally play that is outside the achieved skill set of a child attempting to be performed in a fun and happy context. Helen Dodd and Kathryn Lester published the article, “Adventurous Play as a Mechanism for Reducing Risk for Childhood Anxiety: A Conceptual Model” in 2021. The paper states, “when children play in an adventurous way, climbing trees, riding their bikes fast downhill and jumping from rocks, they experience feelings of fear and excitement, thrill and adrenaline.” One of the difference between risky play and plane hazards in life is that risky play is done in a context of happiness and desire. This pushes each child to get used to feeling uncomfortable and manage their emotions around it. The authors noted that half of all anxiety disorders start before age 11, "so the earlier kids deal with "ambiguity" - the discomfort of not knowing how something will turn out, which they went on to say that which is at the heart of risk – the more chance of nipping anxiety in the bud." (from Let Grow: letgrow.org/risky-play-anxiety/) I was recently a guest on a panel discussing Adventure Playgrounds at the Association of Science & Technology Centers 2024 Conference. Did you know that tons of museums are building adventure playgrounds? Adventure Playgrounds range from "natural playgrounds" to "junk playgrounds". Governors Island is home to play:ground NYC, The Yard. The theme that runs through each is unrestricted play, and the absence of adult made play structures. Often adventure playgrounds are "no adults allowed" other than playworkers, trained to oversee the area. Adventure Playgrounds can have anything from hammers and nails to build with, trees to climb, treehouses to imagine from, ropes to swing on, and access to water. Many utilize found objects to spark creativity and imagination. Adventure playgrounds are facilitators of Risky Play! My portion of the presentation and panel addressed "Educating Grown-ups: Guiding Parents and Caretakers into Risky Play". I felt it was an important topic because allowing risky play the few times you visit an adventure playground isn't enough integration in a child's life. The goal is to support parents and caregivers to introduce, encourage and provide opportunities for risky play. My job as the founder of Gantry Kids is to provide such an environment AND to guide parents through what may be a scary time for them as they incorporate risky play at home. The Benefits The benefits of risky play are countless. In the forefront is learning to be in uncomfortable situations and get to the other side of them. It teaches follow through, coping with stressors, and understanding personal limitations. It also can improve motor skills and cognitive understanding, as well as improve social interaction skills. Kids that are risk adverse don't learn how to manage everyday situations or worse, it causes children to seek out hazardous actions and environments as a form of thrill seeking. Mental Health professionals are in agreement that the lack of risky play can lead to a lack of resilience and the onset of mental health issues like anxiety at a very young age. This almost always requires professional intervention. The Fears As adults we have our own set of fears around allowing children to participate in certain activities. One of the biggest fears around risky play is injury to the child and ability concerns - can the child even do it? Other fears that drive hesitation for adults is our own anxiety and worry. We take it on as if we are experiencing the action and just can't manage our own anxiety as we enter the rabbit hole of worry. By the way no one is more afraid on a skateboard than a newbie adult. Kids, meh, not so much. Lastly, adults, organizations, and municipalities are fearful of litigation. What if a child gets hurt and we get sued? I love fear. It's just our bodies way of telling us we are alive. Fears have a tendency to take over the area of our brains where rational thinking occurs. So stay vigilant and don't allow it. Literally say to yourself, Okay fear, I see and here you. Thanks for the feedback, but I'm going to do it anyway. If we actually looked at the statistical likelihood of something happening versus only considering our concerns we'd be doing way more stuff. Chapter 4: Where We Are as a Society of my book How Not to Ruin Your Kids: A Practical Guide to Raising Happy, Independent, Equipped Children addresses how fear impacts our parenting and in turn our children's agency, self-esteem and autonomy. It also breaks down statistics of one of our deepest fears: kidnapping. I point to the fact that "children abducted by strangers represent .01% of all missing children." Yet, we don't let our kids walk to school, run errands, or play at the playground without an adult for fear of them being taken. Point zero one percent. So you see, fears aren't always rational, supported by evidence or true yet we filter most of our decision making when it comes to our children through those emotions. The REALITY What's your reality? How often are your kids engaging in risky play or enjoying an adventure playground? The reality for most is that kids engage in risky play as a single experience . Whether it's a pop-up event, or an exhibit at a museum or a weekly visit to the cool playground. It's not often enough. Risky play includes everything from climbing, balancing, hanging, jumping, swinging, sliding, running, biking, skating, cutting, poking, whipping, sawing, tying, wrestling, play fighting, rough and tumble play, exploring unknown environments, introducing dangerous elements like elevation change, water, and fire. (Sandsetter, Ellen Beate Hansen and Leif Edward Ottesen Kennair (2011): "Children's Risky Play from an Evolutionary Perspective: The Anti-Phobic Effects of Thrilling Experiences". Evolutionary Psychology. 9:2, 257-284). Is your child engaging in risky play at home? How often do they climb a tree, balance on a curb, saw a piece of wood, play fight, take a short cut through the woods, or build a fire? All of this is risky play. Is risky play available to kids? Do we let them help make dinner and use a knife, are we painting pumpkins or carving them? At our Halloween Kids Night Out! we always have the kids carve pumpkins. Now, they are taught and guided by an adult, but they get to actually do it! Are they swinging on ropes like we do at the gym, or jumping from tall heights, even the couch counts. Biking is even risky play. Remember risky play is adventurous and brings some excitement and thrill to children in a happy environment. They are the barometer, not you. Is their school and after school program a proponent of risky play? Obviously Gantry Kids is! We work really hard to create an organic environment where kids have access to risky play and agency over themselves. We support their growth and encourage their development with each box jump, rope swing, and mile on the bike! Are parents and caregivers being supported? Are you as a parent or caregiver feeling supported in your quest to provide opportunities for risky play? It's hard we know. Hard to trust that your child can do the task, trust that they will stay safe and trust that you are making the right choices. Honestly, that's why a lot of parents send their kids to Gantry Kids. We handle the risky play and the mild heart palpitations. When you feel those, thank your fear for being present and act anyway. What's next? As a way to support parents, besides sending kids to the gym, I created this very basic, but informative info graphic. It breaks down risky play you can incorporate at home and then build on! By incrementally adding risk play to your child's life, you'll see the benefits, but also they are learning a new skill set, which will boost their confidence and independence! Remember, start small. Do things together, your eyes on, your hand off. Then start adding more and more. Don't wait until you are comfortable, acknowledge your fear and act anyway. You can do this!
By Michele Kelber 09 Oct, 2024
Why Free & Risky Play in After School Programs are Crucial for Child Development Parents often prioritize structured activities like homework time or organized sports when considering afterschool care. However, one of the most valuable and sometimes overlooked aspects of a child's development in these programs is free play—and even risky play. These activities provide essential opportunities for children to challenge themselves, develop new skills, and gain confidence, all while having fun. Let's dive into why free and risky play are beneficial, especially in an afterschool setting, and how programs like the ones we run at Gantry Kids & Teens in Long Island City, NY, are embracing these concepts. What Is Free Play and Risky Play? Free play is an unstructured, child-led activity. It’s play that allows children to explore their environment, use their imagination, and engage in physical and creative activities without an adult directing their every move. Whether it's a game of tag, climbing on a jungle gym, or inventing an entirely new game, free play allows kids to learn at their own pace, make decisions, and solve problems. Risky play is a type of free play that involves an element of risk, whether it’s climbing higher than they’ve ever climbed before or trying to balance on a narrow beam. While the word "risky" can sound intimidating, it doesn’t mean putting children in dangerous situations. Instead, it encourages them to test their limits in a somewhat controlled environment, helping them develop resilience, confidence, and problem-solving skills. The Importance of Physical Fitness and Exercise One of the biggest benefits of free and risky play in afterschool care is the opportunity for kids to engage in physical activity. While many afterschool programs focus on academic enrichment, it’s important to remember that physical fitness is just as crucial to a child's well-being. Free play naturally incorporates movement—running, jumping, climbing, and balancing all count as essential forms of exercise. These activities help kids develop strength, coordination, and endurance, which are key for maintaining a healthy body and mind. Afterschool programs that include ample time for free play give kids the chance to burn off energy after a long school day, allowing them to unwind and refresh their bodies and minds. This active form of play also helps combat the growing concern of sedentary lifestyles, especially in a world where children spend increasing amounts of time sitting in classrooms or in front of screens. Social and Emotional Growth Through Play Another critical aspect of free and risky play is the development of social and emotional skills. In an unstructured play environment, children are responsible for setting their own rules and navigating social interactions. They learn how to cooperate, negotiate, and resolve conflicts, which are all important life skills. Free play often leads to group activities where kids have to work together, fostering teamwork and leadership qualities. Risky play, in particular, teaches children to assess their abilities and take calculated risks. For example, when a child decides to climb a tree or cross a balance beam, they learn to gauge the difficulty of the task, weigh the risks, and develop the confidence to try. This type of self-regulation helps build resilience—children learn that it’s okay to fail, and they gain the confidence to try again, which is a lesson that extends far beyond the playground. Kids are taking risks, feeling apprehensive, and nervous in the context of fun. This allows them to manage their emotions and temper anxiety, a real diagnosis for many kids by the time they turn 11. Gantry Kids & Teens: Embracing Play in Long Island City, NY For our Long Island City families, Gantry Kids & Teens has developed a robust afterschool program that embraces the importance of free and risky play. The focus isn’t just on keeping kids busy but on fostering holistic development through creative and physical activities. The program we run at Gantry Kids emphasizes the value of play in building strong bodies and minds, giving children the freedom to explore their abilities in a safe environment.  The team at Gantry understands that children thrive when they are given the chance to lead their own play and push their boundaries. By incorporating elements of risky play, such as climbing, running obstacle courses, or engaging in imaginative games, Gantry Kids & Teens helps kids develop not only physical fitness but also the confidence to face new challenges in life. We also recognize the importance of balancing structured activities with free play. While we offer organized programs to enhance physical and social skills, we also give children the space to engage in self-directed, unstructured activities where they can develop their own games, create friendships, and discover new interests. This balance ensures that kids leave feeling accomplished, energized, and ready for the next day. Play Should Be More Than Just Fun Free and risky play aren’t just fun—they’re foundational elements of a child’s development. In the context of afterschool care and daycare, these activities allow children to gain confidence, build resilience, and strengthen their physical and mental health. Programs that incorporate free play, like what we run at Gantry Kids & Teens, offer kids the chance to develop in a way that structured activities alone cannot provide. When kids are given the opportunity to play freely and take risks, they become more creative, adaptable, and prepared for the world around them. Learn more about our afterschool programs at Gantry in Long Island City, NY .
Train tracks junction
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There are 1000 transitions in a day. Wise words from a Dad of a three year old and a one year old. The truth of the matter is that young children are experiencing most of life for the first time. Everything is awe inspiring. Even if it's the same task, like getting out the door and into the car, they have little recollection of times before, or one little thing makes the experience different for them: the clothes they are wearing, the time of day, a puddle from last nights rain in the driveway, or even where the car is parked. Remember too, that kids are learning analytical thinking and can't truly transfer concepts until they are approaching their teens. You can read more about that in Chapter 3 of my book: "Where Kids Are" How Not to Ruin Your Kids , pp. 25-31. So how do we support them in being able to transition smoothly and easily? The start of school is a HUGE transition for kids. Going from summer fun: late nights and slow mornings, to getting to bed early and up with the sun! In most homes, there is less structure in during the summer months, more physical activity and unstructured time in each day. All those combined create space for kids to self-regulate much easier than during the school year when physical activity and movement in general is extremely limited, and each minute of the day is scheduled out. The new academic year may also be a series of NEW NEW NEW.
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